by Eve Stenson

You know you’re living in "the land of the free" when candidacy for government positions is no longer limited by petty discrimination on the basis of race, gender, religion, or other incidental issues. Such as, for example, the now-outdated notion that only people who haven’t been declared dead should be eligible.

This last barrier to public office has been conquered by Missouri’s late Governor Mel Carnahan. Carnahan, a Democrat, was hot on the campaign trail to wrest a U.S. Senate seat from Republican Senator John Ashcroft, when he was involved in a fatal plane crash October 16. The nearness to the November 7 election date, however, meant that Carnahan’s name could not be taken off the ballot.

Thus, Carnahan is still eligible to be elected. Should he win, Missouri’s new governor (also a Democrat) would appoint someone to fill the position.

His current choice is Carnahan’s widow. Although she has never held public office before, Jean Carnahan accepted the offer, vowing to "take [the people of Missouri’s] common dreams to the United States Senate," should her deceased husband be elected.

One might think that his lack of vital signs might decrease his chances. Ashcroft apparently did; he took a week off campaigning. It turns out, though, that he might have been a little too hasty in his assumption.

Rather than hurting his popularity among voters, Carnahan’s untimely demise has actually helped his standings in the polls. While the governor was still alive, the Missouri Senate race "was considered one of the tightest in the nation," according to cnn.com. Recently, though, the late Carnahan has pulled ahead and is estimated to be leading by five to 11 percent.

Thus, we are facing a revolutionary new method of attracting votes. It makes sense, if you really think about it; after all, the traditional hand-shaking and "baby" kissing involve so much time and energy and offer far less certain success. Death, on the other hand, is a one-time effort that seems to be much more popular with the voters.

Perhaps this interesting discovery will be seen by other politicians as a cue to engineer their own untimely exits, as well. We can only hope.

In the meantime, Americans can celebrate our "democracy" by building on this trend. While allowing the deceased to run for office is certainly a significant "accomplishment," the implications are much more far-reaching.

Perhaps the next step can be to allow individuals to run for office who never actually lived, per se. After all, I hear Mickey Mouse already gets the greatest percent of write-in votes, and it wouldn’t be that big of a jump, considering some of the characters we have in office already.

(published in The Ram, 2 November 2002)